Graduation season is upon us. That seems surprising in a year when I’ve just gotten the lawn mower out of the shed and not yet “summerized” the snow blower, but the earliest ceremonies commence next weekend. This includes the University of Connecticut, where my wife Jenny will walk for the MBA she completed last summer.
I like graduations. Not the ceremonies themselves, but the atmosphere surrounding them. It is an atmosphere of unabashed pride where conventions titled towards modesty give way to the pageantry of praise.
In general, we don’t spend enough time telling other people that we’re proud of them. Covering them with robes and tassles and sitting next to a crying grandmother somehow makes it easier.
I blame the utterly confusing intersection of pride, arrogance, and humility – each of which are considered admirable in some lights but detestable in others. I don’t know when that line started blurring in my life, but it clearly increases with age.
Nobody claimed I was arrogant during my preschool graduation recitation of ‘The Wheels on the Bus,’ even though I nailed it.
The driver on the bus says “move on back, move on back, move on back!”
In fact, the prouder I was of myself, the more love that was returned to me.
The same cannot be said of a clip my brother took after my law school graduation several decades later. There was definitely pride and love, but it was tempered by a compulsion to keep me humble.
After admitting she’d been crying earlier and was very proud of me, Mom is also quick to cut me down with a reference to some line a speaker had made at the ceremony.
My father, when asked if he has anything to say to me on my graduation, responds, “Get a job.”
Neither comment was said with malice, but it’s worth noting that preschool Chris would’ve never been subjected to such sleights. Everybody loved that guy.
The rudest graduation moment I ever experienced came during my graduation from Ithaca College in 2003 when our commencement speakers hijacked the ceremony to rail against nuclear proliferation. At least I think that’s what they were saying, it was hard to hear over all the boos.
While it was important to have my college sacrifices recognized – my friends and I spent years pouring over our books and drinking in all that college had to offer; we left no resource untapped during our time on campus – my graduation was made more meaningful by the people who shared in the pride of my accomplishment.
The same can be said for every graduation I’ve had the honor to attend. One of the most special I’ve witnessed was my mother-in-law’s graduation from college. After taking a single course every semester for over a decade, her graduation (with a 4.0 GPA) was a time of true thankfulness and celebration.
It was a very special moment that Jenny and I will always remember.
Graduations are fine events by themselves, but it is the memories’ longevity that makes them truly remarkable.
Humor and humility were a big part of my law school graduation.
The video clip from my law school graduation has become one of my most treasured videos because it features my two step-grandparents and mother, all of whom are now deceased. On that day we took the time to come together, share in each other’s joy, and raise a glass to new beginnings. It doesn’t get any better than that.
This coming week will be filled with special moments to celebrate Jenny. And we’re doubling down with another celebration around Memorial Day to join together with Jenny’s side of the family in Michigan.
I’m excited, not just to honor my wife’s accomplishment, but to celebrate our values and share best wishes with the people who mean the most to us.
Congratulations to everyone celebrating someone this graduation season. May your futures all be bright.
And a special congratulations to my wife, my life, my Lady: you did it, dear! I’m very proud of you and look forward to many more celebrations standing by your side.
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