Any time adults are playing a game at one of my family parties, a niece or nephew inevitably wants to join. When this happens with Wiffle Ball, we let them get a free at bat in between innings.
Toddlers have an amazing batting average in my family wiffle ball games. Read More
There are lots of books in my house.
Most are on shelves, some are in piles, and many others are scattered all around the house, except for in the bathroom.
Thankfully, smartphones have made the tacky basket-full-of-books-in-the-bathroom trend obsolete. Read More
Ambition’s funny.
Like the ocean, it’s never still; each part affects another transferring energy until it either crests or breaks re-emerging later as something new that’s similar, but not quite identical, to what it was before. Read More
Have you ever cleaned a nipple?
Before I even became a father, Dr. Brown had me cleaning them five at a time with a nipple-sized brush he gave me along with an urgent notice to sanitize all of my nipples prior to use. Read More
Primary elections aren’t about government, they’re about values. Parenting basically follows the same formula. Read More
I used to think I liked watching the Oscars for the host’s monologue, then just sort of kept it on.
But after last year had no host, I realized that even though I haven’t seen the movies and can’t name most of the stars, I watch the Oscars every year because I like seeing other people thanked. Read More
All of my conversations with other babies’ parents consist of two parts: the agreement that we can’t compare how different babies develop, and the rest of the conversation where all we do is compare how our babies are developing.
Despite each of us agreeing that every baby develops differently, comparing babies is parents’ favorite pastime. Read More
A fresh snowstorm temporarily changes the way I perceive the world.
I say “temporarily” because I fear change and immediately start shoveling once the last flake falls. Read More
I have the same response any time my parenting is either praised or questioned: “Well,” I say while gazing across the rim of my imaginary cognac glass, “I did study newborn parenting at Yale.”
I let this sit for awhile, basking in the glow of newfound respect emanating from my audience, despite knowing full well that my wife is about to clarify that my studies consisted of a single (free) Newborn Parenting Care Class at Yale New Haven Hospital, where we had our daughter. Read More
If I could bring to life one inanimate object from around my house (like in Beauty and the Beast), it would be a roll of paper towels.
I simply love the things. Read More